the most frightening thing about fasting, for me, is giving up sugar. sugar and booze. i thoroughly enjoy both, on a very regular basis. the thing about both of these, at least for me, is that one drink, or one cookie always calls for more. and while i don’t get drunk (at least these days) and i’m not obese, the lack of self control is the issue. i would never have a second helping of salad if i was full. i would not have ‘one last’ glass of water, if i had just sucked down three
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i will give them up though, for my fast, the length of which i am still unsure about. i will give up booze and sugar, and i will be fine. i will be a better person for it. my body will be detoxed, and i will feel free. i am looking forward to that freedom. i am looking forward to feeling like myself, to not being a slave to consumption.
i smoked cigarettes for a long time. almost twenty years. when i quit for good (it took me several 2 or 3 months tries and fails to do so), i remember listing in my head over and over all the reasons there were to quit. the reason that really stuck with me, even above cancer and wrinkles, was not being a slave to the addiction. the draw of quitting was being able to say I am stronger than my cravings, I am stronger than the chemical reaction in my brain that makes consuming these substances so appealing. I AM strong enough, and I deserve that freedom.
i have been feeling these last few days, since i have decided to do a juice fast, that i need to eat every food that i have ever loved (vegan only, of course), just in case it is the last time i ever eat it again. i realize that this is not a healthy relationship to have with food. but it is not all food. it is sugar, and it is booze. after the fast i can have all the fruits and vegetables and nuts and seeds that i desire, and to be honest, i will most likely come up with some sort of ‘sugar free’ margarita, and maybe i will develop a new love for chia seed pudding…but for now, i am glad for the vacation from the pull that sugar and booze have on me. and i am looking forward to that freedom.
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Annie Eats Apples 